Countdown To Oz

All in all, there didn't seem to be that much to see within KL Central. I was thinking about venturing out elsewhere but thought that it might be best if I save my money for Australia. I had no idea how long it would take for me to get a job and didn't want to start eating into the money I saved for New Zealand and America. There was nothing that I could think of that I really wanted to see. Even though I had already made my mind up that I wasn't going to be up to much during my last few days, I was sickie. I have no idea why or where it came from but I felt terrible. It was rather pathetic but there were still some things that I needed to do before I left for Australia.

Mel had told me that the sim cards and international call costs in KL are really cheap. I'd not spoken to my parents or anyone back home since leaving so thought it would be nice to hear some familiar voices. It didn't quite go according to plan. I organised a time with my parents - it was my mum's day off and the time scheduled was the start of my dad's lunch break - and a friend. I tried calling and it went through to voicemail. Why in the hell would my mum be on the phone when I'm supposed to be calling? I tried again and it said that my call couldn't be connected. This didn't look good. After several attempts I admitted defeat and swore loudly at my phone. I continued to chunter and spit out expletives despite the fact that I wasn't alone in my 16 bed dorm room. I didn't care. I'm still invisible in my room so they can say/do what they like. I wasn't happy at all. I felt crap and the only thing that would make my day worthwhile turned into nothing. What an arse of a day.

The following day I was in quite a bit of pain and experiencing weird hot sweats and dizzy spells. There was something going round the hostel apparently. I forced myself out of bed and one of the girls offered me some paracetamol. Normally I don't take tablets. Back home I just deal with it as I don't like the thought of taking lots of pills if the pain is manageable. That probably sounds weird but hey. I felt a bit better after I had a shower so continued with my day. First stop was the post office. As per usual, I had no idea where I was going. I asked reception for directions but they weren't very helpful. For some reason everything seems to be straight ahead...when it's not obviously. It's funny when you're with friends but when you're on your own it sucks. Strangely, a local helped me find my way. I was going in the wrong direction. He walked part of the way with me and gave me two copies of a more detailed local map. I could have done with that on my first day really!

My next challenge was figuring out how to send my crap back home. By crap, I mean crap. I have accumulated a lot of stuff that I'd like to keep but don't actually need. I have a lot of that at home too, which is why my room normally resembles a scene from How Clean Is Your House or Hoarders. I'm like the little old lady who won't throw out her battered biscuit tins.

I managed to find a padded envelope big enough to contain my hoard and walked around for a little bit. The stature of the main post office is quite overwhelming but the front desk area is surprisingly small. The decor is white and glass only so I feel like I'm in some futuristic laboratory or a mental institution. The latter would be very fitting for my state of mind whilst being away! After asking a series of (what felt like to me) daft questions, I queued at the correct till point. The assistant weighed it, attached a mailing sticker to the parcel, took my money then handed it back to me. Wait...what? He pointed to a lady at a desk on the other side of the reception area. Bemused, I sidled up to said lady and proffered my parcel. Success. I walked out with my head held high. I didn't look too ridiculous and there were just as many locals who didn't know what they were doing either.

By this point, I was quite far from the hostel and didn't fancy spending a further hour or bumbling about. I doubt I would be so lucky to find a friendly local willing to help me again. I decided to catch the train. On the way back I remembered to take some photos of the graffiti painted along the embankment. The local governing body allows this area to be an open canvas for local artists. The graffiti is kept for a period of time and then painted over for new pieces. If, however, a piece is especially brilliant, it will stay there longer.

Never-ending story

On the way back to the hostel, I stopped off at KL Central station to purchase my train ticket to Singapore. Again, to save money, I opted for a night train. There were no beds available so I would be seated the whole way. Having experienced night journeys in Japan, Thailand and the first half of Malaysia, I felt like I knew the score. I decided to locate where I needed to wait for the train as I didn't want to have to look for it when I had the beast.

I found this at the station. You stick your hand in the mouth and the machine reads your palm. Very strange!

After a long afternoon, I felt that I deserved a treat. Starbucks was the closest place I could find and just happened to be a regular haunt of mine due to the free wifi. I was going to get my usual mocha when I saw a new Christmassy drink which looked delicious. Cranberry White Chocolate Mocha Frappuccino? Yes please.

Table not included!

I looked around for somewhere to sit and all that was available was a set of four seats minus a table. The area was ignored and a few people in front of me walked away. I wanted a seat and a table wasn't essential to me. I embraced the ostracised resting space. I had a sudden flashback to my childhood where we'd all pretend to be on a train, using our imaginations to create the outer shell. All those around me were too engrossed in their business meetings or studies to notice me and my humourous circumstance. 

I enjoyed my drink but my sweet tooth was left unsatisfied. I just happened to pass a cake counter and succumbed to the urge.

Triple chocolate decadence.

I had one more stop before I could truly rest. The duff sim card I was given needed to be sorted. It did end up costing me more than it should have done as I spent half of my credit trying to call home. Annoyingly the charges start as soon as the phone rings. So even if you don't get to speak to someone, it still costs you money. Great if you want to bankrupt stalkers, not so good for me who just wanted to call home. The shop assistant who sold me the sim card recognised me straight away and asked how I was getting on. Somehow he managed to fix it and I was put through to my dad. I didn't even think about what time it was back home. I'd called really early and both my parents were getting ready for work. Oops. I arranged to speak to my mum later and jumped on Facebook to tell my friend that I'd sorted my phone. Hooray.

I spoke to my mum for half an hour about absolutely nothing. There was no major news from home so we just spoke about Twilight and other films as well as what I was missing on TV. I write most of what happens in my blog so I felt like my mum knew everything already! My mum listed all the people she knows who reads my blog which was surprising. I have a little York fanbase. Hey guys!! It was quite touching as my mum excitedly told me. It felt like she was proud of what I've been doing and my writing which comforted me. Who doesn't like having proud parents?

The night was young and I still had time for a final trip to the Reggae Bar and another dose of the shisha!

Concentration: I'm attempting the dragon.

Mel shows me how it's done.

We're like a little family now.

Does anyone think that Steff looks like a Russian sailor in his stripy top? He keeps getting asked if he's Russian. It's bizarre.

Chinatown is completely different on a night. The streets are so quiet and everything is boarded up so it felt like I was in some old western movie. It would be fitting for a tumbleweed to waft by my ankles at this moment. Instead it was a giant cockroach followed by a judgemental white cat who turned its nose up at a rat which scuttled past.

Petaling Street: Seemingly the heart and soul of Chinatown

Rubbish and other debris coat the streets whilst the street lanterns hover above like fireflies.

Although my evening with the guys ended on a high, my return to the dorm soon brought me back to reality. It stank. I don't mean it was a little bit whiffy. It was so strong, I thought somebody had actually gone to the bathroom in my dorm. It was disgusting. I really feel that girls are a heck of a lot dirtier than guys. This moment just confirms it further! I decided to stay up as long as I could, using my laptop as a distraction, so I could then fall to sleep straight away and not choke on the fumes. Be warned guys, they may look all girly and innocent but they're not. They're worse than you!

*****

Mel, Steff and I checked out on the same day. We had to be out of our rooms by 12pm but could still use the hostel facilities. We stuck around for a bit and had something to eat before heading to KL Central station. Mel and Steff were going to catch a flight destined for the Gold Coast in Australia. They planned on renting a car and driving to Sydney. It sounded like a lovely way to see Australia and wished them luck. I was at the station incredibly early to hijack some wifi, call my friend back home and then eventually make my way to the platform for my night train.

Not before seeing this though...

First a palm reader, now a love test.

Are you a dead fish?

Kuala Lumpur was good but probably not worth a two week stay unless you're visiting friends. There's plenty to do socially but if you just want to "see the sights" then a day or two will be sufficient. Chinatown is crazy but if you've travelled within SE Asia you'll be fine. I enjoyed my time here and made some friends I hope to see again in the future. 

Won't You Take Me To Chinatown

Reggae Mansion was a swish hostel compared to the ones I have previously stayed in. Others weren't so convinced. One girl exclaimed, "It's so small, hmph." Another commented on the following photo asking where the beds are.

Hopefully most of you can see the beds are the curtained cubicles with green lockers underneath. The girl on Facebook thought the cubicles were in fact cupboards. Oh dear. Cupboards in dorm rooms, ha!

The dorms were spacious, had multiple air con units and clothes hooks. That doesn't sound like much but its amenities like these that make life a little easier. The thing is, you can choose your dorm but you can't choose who resides in them. You get your snorers, your stinkers and your weirdos but this room took the biscuit. Nobody said hello and I seemed to be invisible when I tried to make conversation. No wait, I tell a lie. A girl asked me if I had a plug adapter. I did not (KL uses 3 pins like back home). The girl frowned and slipped away without a word. Pfft. I kept my curtain open to see if anyone would say "Hi" as they entered or left. I smiled at a few girls and greeted others but nothing. Ah well. I tried.

Breakfasts were good there. It was only on my third day that I realised it wasn't self-service and I was supposed to wait for someone to dish out the food. I was hungry dammit! I did get a bit bored of scrambled eggs each day and I ate far too much white bread toast. It was free and I can never resist a freebie. I seriously need to get my jog on in Australia.

I met up with Mel and Steffan but things weren't going so well for them. They both contracted Dengue Fever. Nasty. Steff got the brunt of the disease and ended up in hospital. Thankfully, both of them were ok. I told them about Reggae Mansion and convinced them to join me. They agreed to check in tomorrow. What cheered me up further was the trip to the cinema to see Tower Heist. Well, not initially. We rushed to make a showing but the queue was so damn slow. This felt exactly like home! However, unlike showings at home, in KL they don't have half an hour of adverts and trailers before a film. You'll be lucky if you see more than three trailers then it's straight into the movie. The server said that we'd have time but we clearly missed it. Annoyed, we purchased tickets for the next showing. We had a couple of hours to burn so decided to find somewhere to eat. This also proved to be a challenge as everything was shutting. As Mel argued with the abrupt waitress in Nandos, Steff and I ventured on as our stomachs growled with hunger. 

Three pasta dishes later and we were ready for our comedy injection. We laughed, hard. Eddie Murphy was on top form. I did have my doubts but these were quashed after the first scene stealing moment Murphy had. All smiles, we retreated to our hostels and agreed to meet in the morning.

*****

The rest of my week was a bit of a blur. Mel, Steff and I were a bundle of nerves trying to figure out a plan for Sydney. Backpackers each gave us their nuggets of wisdom. For me, none of it helped. So far all I've heard is the vague, "There are loads of jobs you'll be fine," or "Pick up some farm work." Is that all you have? Great, thanks. It's a good job I have friends who have either been to Australia or know people out there. I've received some great snippets of advice along the way. Once I have sorted my life out here, I will upload some informative pieces on each country I have been to.

With all this stress in the air, the three of us decided to unwind at the local Reggae Bar.

My first shisha moment...

Steff and his impression of a steam train.

Yep...I've no idea what I'm doing either...

Mel and Steff certainly had fun experimenting with the shisha

I had a lot of fun with Steff and Mel that night. It's nice to finally meet some people that I'll get to know well as opposed to spending one or two days with them and saying goodbye. It's one thing that has brought me down at certain points in my trip. Saying goodbye to awesome people isn't fun. I've said goodbye to some idiots too though so sometimes it is nice to have a change of scenery and meet new people.

Another good thing that has come from meeting Mel and Steff is how much they make me laugh. From their crazy "heated debates" to their weird accent impressions, I'm always guaranteed a smile when I'm around them. It may sound like an odd mix - me hanging out with a couple - but it never feels that way when I'm with them. Thankfully they're not one of those couples that constantly straddle each other nor are they of the smug variety too. they're just your average cute couple who I just happen to be great mates with. I've hung out with each of them separately too and it's never been a problem either. Steff is incredibly easy going and Mel doesn't go all Jeremy Kyle while she's at work and me and Steff have tea together.

Just to prove my point further, Heidi and Jon (the couple I met on my way to Ko Tao and then again in Krabi) stayed in Reggae Mansion a few days after I arrived. I didn't get to speak to them too much as they weren't in KL for long and I didn't want to get in the way. They are also heading over to Australia so I might see them again which would be lovely.

Despite my nerves for Australia, I'm happy and thankful for a lot of things. I have had more down moments than I thought I would along the way but it doesn't take me that long to dust myself off and get on with things. Whenever that happens I just think back to how I was feeling before the idea for this trip popped into my head and smile.

Fashion Failure

The good news is that Josh felt better, the bad news is that we no longer had a car. I had no idea what was happening and didn't want to press too much about what this meant for our plans that week. They had enough to deal with without some backpacker proclaiming, "What about meeeeeee?" I needn't have worried as Josh had a Plan B. Mummy De Souza entrusted Josh with her car. Hooray!

First on the agenda was sightseeing which meant travelling back to KL Central subsequently passing the danger spot that caught us out the night before. We were all a little nervy at that point but we made it to KL Central safe and sound. Phew. As we entered KL, the landscape transformed. Buildings sprouted from the ground and towered towards the sky. From where I was travelling in, the buildings appeared to conjugate in one area shunning their surroundings. 

My view from the car.

Each building was an architectural treat to the eye. So many different shapes and sizes drowned my eyes but one building did stand out and it was our first stop.

The Petronas Towers.

This is the building with the sole function of cooling the Petronas Towers.

A funky alternative to a chandelier in the reception of the towers.

We weren't able to visit the observation deck inside the towers as it was closed for maintenance. It was still worth a visit though. Josh, who is studying architecture, informed me that this structure is famed for its friendliness. I asked what he meant by that and Josh added that the lower decks and support pillars at the bottom of buildings similar to this are usually encased. Here, you are able to walk around as you please. Soon after that we witnessed a friendliness of a different kind. We approached someone to enquire about visiting the observation deck. He confirmed our thoughts of it being closed but continued to chatter away. He thought that we were all backpackers and couldn't quite get his head around the fact that these guys were showing me around. He shook each of our hands and we departed. This guy had the firmest handshake ever. I was still bouncing. I understand that, in general, a firm handshake represents confidence but Josh says that in Malaysia, the firmer the handshake, the better. Anything less is a sign of weakness. This guy was far from weak!

After our encounter with heavy-handshake guy, we went for a stroll in the park nearby. The sun showed no sign of leaving and beat us into thirsty submission. Not before taking some photos of course...

From left to right: Noel, Kenny and Josh.

An alternative perspective of the Petronas towers.

The building in the middle - The Troika, luxury apartments - was designed by Fosters and Partners, the firm behind the 30 St Mary Axe AKA The Gherkin in London.

Josh was a walking encyclopedia of all things KL. It certainly put my level of knowledge of England to shame.  I was asked whether I knew the meaning of Kuala Lumpur. I had no idea. It sounds quite exotic so was sure it meant something grandiose. It seems not. Kuala Lumpur translates to muddy estuary in Malay. Lovely. Well...I don't think I can top that moment!

With my injection of culture happily settling within my system, there was one more thing I needed to do before the day ended. For weeks now I have been trying not to succumb to my screaming desires but I just can't hold back any more. I need a device with wifi capabilities. It's not just to make updating my blog easier, but access to information in general. There are so many times when I have needed maps, hostel information or to book something but have had to go looking for an internet cafe and pay. I was looking for a good deal though. It was a good job I had someone who works at HP to seek out the best gadge then.

The guys took me to a shopping mall dedicated to gadgets - cameras, laptops, mobile phones, tablets...etc. It was slightly overwhelming but it didn't take me long to find a good deal. I got a nice little netbook/notebook in sexy red. Oh and it has 2GB memory and 500GB storage which is good enough for me. The guy also threw in a pack of goodies including a case, brushes and cleaner, USB hub, headphones and a mouse. I was very happy and looked forward to trying it out. Unfortunately, when we got back home, it turned out that the wifi wasn't connected so no fun for me.

Walking back to the car, I remembered something that I wanted to ask for a while now. I kept seeing VIP stickers stuck on peoples' windscreens and was curious as to what it meant. Noel's car and the family car both have these stickers.

What the hell is a McDonald's VIP?

Josh informed me that McDonald's is the most common food eaten in Malaysia. He went on to tell me that some people eat it every day or at least three times a week. Josh said that if he called McDonald's (call them?!) then they would know straight away who he was. You get extra fries and free upgrades with being a VIP. You can call ahead and ask for a meal to be ready for when you arrive and queue jump. Ha! Of all the places in the world where you would think that queue jumping would be an option, McDonald's would be my last choice! This is madness!

We didn't have McDonald's that night, instead, we had meatballs and chips at Ikea. Random but pretty good actually. I got to know Josh's mum a bit more and became very jealous as she works in a bakery and brings home goodies at the end of her shift. As always, it's all about the cake.

As there was no internet at home we went to an internet cafe. I was a little bit grouchy as I'd just bought a netbook and I couldn't use it yet. The place was filled with teenage boys who were still there when we left in the early hours.

*****

I ended up doing absolutely nothing the next day. I think Josh was out at college and I had no idea where Noel was. I didn't really know where I was or what there was to do around the immediate area. Instead, I had a forced lazy day. I think it was this day that Josh showed me his family photos. It was such a sweet moment. As Josh was the first born, there were lots of photos of him as a baby. His brothers and sisters were all cute little children. I also got to see photos of his father who is no longer with us. Josh spoke openly about his father and the rest of his family which was surprisingly kind.

*****

The following day I tried to be a bit more proactive. There was more shopping that I needed to do and where better to do it than KL? There are malls everywhere. Victoria, Josh's sister, joined us. It was good to have female company as shopping with guys isn't the greatest...although they do come in handy with bag carrying....

We went to a lower market mall with cheap clothes. This is exactly what I needed. I know that my clothes aren't going to last very long seen as I wear each item so much. What's the point in buying something high street when I can get the same for cheaper elsewhere? At first I couldn't find anything I wanted. The shops were full of party outfits and dresses, lots and lots of beautiful dresses. I did get distracted. I love dresses. But no. I had a list and I needed to stick to it. I found some basic tops soon enough but buying leggings was surprisingly difficult. Each shop I went to refused me entry to the changing rooms with leggings. The shop assistants proclaimed that the leggings will fit and that one size fits all. With that, they'd stretch the leggings out to an unhealthy width as if that was meant to convince me. I think we've all seen the girls who wear leggings of the wrong size. The first sign is the thinning of the material so it becomes almost see through. The next is the elasticated waistband which digs into your sides creating a very unflattering look. I want to hide my love handles, not quadruple them!

I almost gave up when we stumbled across a very odd looking shop. It was definitely my last resort. Could a shop that contains the following outfits hold leggings? And by leggings, I mean plain black leggings. No glitter, tassels or crazy patterns. Please?

Noel showed an unhealthy attachment to this outfit.

The perfect outfit for a night out in KL?

This was just the display outside. What was on the inside was a whole world of weird. It was like a cross between Ann Summers, a fancy dress shop and a vintage New Look. Somehow they had leggings. Nice, normal leggings. What's more, the shop assistant was lovely and let me try them on. They were a perfect fit and made up of good quality material. I decided that I needed to explore this shop further. However, for some reason, the shop assistant decided to follow me around. From the fluffy negligee and man-thongs to the crazy fancy dress/role play outfits (these guys had more than just maids, coppers and nurses, wow!). I decided to pay for my leggings and go as this place was freaking me out!

So that was that. A crazy end to a lovely week spent with the De Souza family. It was nice to be around a family and feel somewhat settled for once. I felt incredibly welcomed despite the fact that I was a complete stranger to all but one of them.

Noel and Josh escorted me to my next destination, Reggae Mansion in Chinatown. Noel carried the beast with ease which was impressive. I had to carry it up two flights of stairs though when I arrived. Reggae Mansion is massive. It's only two months old so it stood out like a flower amid a bed of wilting weeds. Not to be too harsh on Chinatown but it was, as a friend so aptly put, a nut job. It is very busy and worn down. The hostel was fresh, inviting and swarming with backpackers. I had my own cubicle with a locker below my bed with enough space to fit the beast and its offspring. I dumped my stuff and went downstairs to meet Josh and Noel. We had lunch at the adjoining restaurant which was cheap and tasty. We were going to venture out further but...

Crazy town.

Reggae Mansion by night.

The rest of the day flew by and it was time to settle down and think about what I need to do before I head out to Australia.

Let Them Eat Cake

Poor Josh was still sickie so had to bow out from a lot of what we did over the next few days. It was a shame and, at the same time, a little strange that I would be spending more time with his brothers and sisters than with him. It's a good job his family are lovely then! Josh lives at home with his two brothers and one of his sisters - I don't think I mentioned that Josh's family is massive! I believe he has two brothers and three sisters but don't quote me on that as I might have lost count part way through my stay! I only have one sibling so anything more than that is a large family to me.

I spent most of the day with Noel and Kenny. Noel was chatty and friendly whereas Kenny didn't say that much unless it was to say that something is boring. Kenny is the most difficult person to please but I think that's what most teenagers are like. Noel was very honest and open about a lot of aspects in his life which was foreign to me. There are certain things I don't mind talking about so I reciprocated. 

It was another late night late morning so we spent the afternoon in one of KL's many shopping malls. This one was Egyptian themed and called Sunway Pyramid. As the name suggests, the building is pyramid shaped and "protected" by a large lion statue at the front. The decor indoors consists of an unlimited supply of gold leafing emblazoned with hieroglyphics. As a finishing touch, the mall also includes...

...an ice rink of course.

We had a quick wander around but food was needed fast. The decision to come to Sunway actually came from my craving for french fries. I haven't eaten many good versions of the french fry since being away but was optimistic that Malay fries would be close to the best. This mall had a restaurant that sold french fries and french fries alone with any topping you can think of. Be that chocolate (you weirdos), wasabi (brave...or stupid) to the basics - cheese, chilli etc. I had chips, cheese and BBQ mayo. Noel received his bolognese chips first and a while later I received mine. I'm not sure if the delay in serving each person's dish is an Asian thing or a strange coincidence. Thailand was the same. One person would get their dish, then 10-15 minutes later another person would get their dish. My theory is that usually families and groups of friends order dishes to share so timing is never an issue.

The Malay's love for food has been the strongest on my travels. I got a similar feeling when in Japan but I think that was more to do with the appreciation for the best food. This is only the beginning for Malays. It seems like all they think about is food - http://feedmelah.com/blog/malaysians-love-food/. Perhaps I have Malay blood as I feel exactly the same way about cake. The thought train listed in the link above is exactly what I go through but with cake. I love food too so felt right at home here. I was so happy.

My day just seemed to get better and better. We went to a shop that had tubs of samples for every type of sweet in the store. I was reluctant to go in as I knew I'd end up buying something. We went in...and I bought something. I took advantage of the free samples and nobody judged me for it. I left with sour apple sugar strips and gummy bears. I thought I'd received my sugar fix for the day when I sniffed something else out...

Ultimate Food Challenge: Mushroom popcorn anyone?

This looked pretty gross. The challenge was to eat a tub and a further bag of mushroom flavoured popcorn. I think I'd be sick after one bite. The popcorn was provided by a stall in the shopping centre that only sells popcorn with crazy flavours - curry flavour, wasabi (seriously what is it with you guys?), chocolate, caramel etc. The popcorn is full flavoured and seedless. It's a franchise so if anyone is looking for a new business venture, bring this across to the UK and you'd be minted. Maybe leave the wasabi behind though.

I decided to have a look at what other challenges were available. There was an ice cream guzzling contest which made me shiver. I have sensitive teeth so brain freeze would be the last thing on my mind. There was a Nandos chicken leg eating contest and then I saw one that made me stop in my tracks. Dessert gobbling contest...dessert...gobbling...contest. Sign me up!!! I signed up. I needed a contact number so used Noel's and was told that I would be called before the contest begins. I needed to arrive an hour before it starts. That's my next day planned then! I really hoped I would be chosen as that challenge sounded awesome. It was guaranteed that I would win so saw what the prize was. A year's free eating at the sponsor's restaurant/shop. Free cake for a year? I'm not here for a year so was thinking about how much cake I could eat before I'd leave (Singapore customs declarations: Any food, plants etc: Cake and lots of it. Let me in please). Maybe I could make some room in my backpack for more cake. The beast was, at this point, with-child. I decided to attach my day pack to my main pack to accommodate for some extra items I acquired. I'm packing for two now so the added cake would be a perfect use of the extra space!

Fi geek as well as an action seeker, comedy lover and so on and so forth. It's only horror that I refuse to watch. Why would I want to pay to see that?

*****

I decided to forfeit breakfast in preparation for today's inevitable feasting. I was optimistic that I would get chosen. If I turned up in good time, I'm sure I'd get through. They accept the first 20 people they can contact and I'm not sure how long the waiting list was but it just had to happen. Time moved on and I didn't get chosen. I was gutted. I decided to torture myself and see what the challenge was. Ok, challenge is an insult. All they had to do was gobble a teeny tiny pancake and a small pot of yogurt. That'd take me less than a minute. This is meant to be a food challenge! I had dizzying daydreams of the cake eating scene in Matilda (Bruce Bogtrotter - go Brucie!). I think I would have been more disappointed had I been chosen and ended up eating that drivel. I'm glad I stayed around as that made me feel a lot better. It was only when we walked back to the car that Noel discovered two missed calls on his phone from a number he didn't recognise. This was around the time that the mall would be calling people for the contest. Seen as Noel and his family know pretty much everyone in KL, I knew this was definitely Sunway. Damn. I told Noel he owed me a massive piece of cake Noel kindly offered to buy me some cake to make up for it.

Although I have been in KL for a couple of days, I haven't actually seen much of it. Noel drove us to the college to pick up Josh and drive into KL central. I was looking forward to seeing the Petronas Towers at night. Unfortunately we got a bit sidetracked...

Oh dear. I like how Josh is casually leaning out of the window having a smoke. The door on his side wouldn't open.

We were involved in a five car collision on the way to KL central. We were in the last car which isn't good news for any Malaysian. Here, the person in the last car pays for all the damage caused to the cars in front. It doesn't matter who caused the crash. I couldn't believe it. Noel stormed out of the car to investigate the damage and find out what happened. There was already oil on the road from a crash that happened hours previously. The heavy rain didn't help either. We happened to be in the wrong place at the wrong time. I had no idea what was going to happen and didn't want to seem pushy so I just waited around. I decided to go for a little nap as it seemed like we were going to be there for a while waiting for the breakdown service. I was told that Josh's sister would be coming to pick us up. Kenny and I went off with the rest of his family for something to eat. Josh and Noel went to the police station and joined us later for food. The ride home was interesting...

In front, Kenny on Josh's lap, I'm on the right, Noel is in the middle and to the left is Josh's two sisters.

I had no idea what would happen now we didn't have a car. Obviously I can use public transport but I had no idea where I was and relied on Noel and Josh to ferry me about!

Family, Friendship And Foooood!

I'm not sure Thailand and I were a good fit, especially as Japan was my previous destination. It was a step down for me in many ways. Japan is incredibly safe, very clean and extremely organised. Thailand wasn't the safest, isn't that clean and I don't think the word organisation has a Thai translation being that it doesn't exist. I didn't feel very welcome and felt like an inconvenience most of the time. It felt like the locals were fed up with tourists crowding their streets and filling their bars but the money is needed. I witnessed the bittersweet relationship locals have with tourists. Of course there are always the exceptions and I have listened to other peoples' different experiences. If I went to Chiang Mai/Rai, it would have been a very different story. This is one of the reasons why I was so happy to be staying with Josh and his family for the first week of my stay in KL. I'd definitely gain a better insight into the Malay culture.

Josh took me back to his family home in Selangor. Despite Josh's tired state, he still managed to recount some facts about his home town. Selangor is a well developed and rich state of Malaysia. Many millionaires live here. It took all my energy to keep my eyes open and my mind whirring so I don't recall any other facts.

Josh and I were both exhausted so went straight to bed. I was briefly introduced to one of his brothers who was asleep on the couch. I had no idea what the plan was for my stay with them but thought I'd just go with it and see what happens.

The first thing I learned about the Malay lifestyle is that everyone is laid back. So laid back that these guys are practically horizontal. Josh and his brothers were very honest about this and a battle of one-upmanship unfolded. I could somewhat relate as I too am quite lazy at times. Today, I was thankful for this behaviour as I was exhausted. We got up late, watched a bit of TV and headed out for breakfast. This is where my second lesson in Malay living occurred. Malays love their food so my large and choosy appetite was applauded. It's not unusual for a Malay to drive over two hours (one way) for a great meal. I love that. Thanks to Josh's brother Noel, driving was certainly not an issue. Noel was our chauffeur during my stay which made things a lot easier as I didn't have to navigate!

I wasn't sure what to have to eat as it wasn't really breakfast time - we headed out at around 2pm! As I was still undecided, Josh picked the destination. Noel, Ken (Josh's other brother), Josh and I headed over to Asia Cafe which is an open food court. As we neared an already occupied table, Josh whispered to me that I'm about to meet a prince but to act as I normally would. Before I had time to react, Josh and his brothers greeted their friends and introduced me. If I knew I was going to be meeting a prince, I would have done something better with my hair or put some tinted moisturiser on at least! I needn't have worried as Josh was right in telling me to act normal. If Josh hadn't have mentioned that he was royalty, I'd have no idea! He looked and acted like any other teenager.

Josh and I returned with some chicken and rice. As I tucked in to this tasty yet wallet-friendly meal, I tried to keep up with the conversation flow. It soon turned to football and, as Manchester United had just lost to Manchester City 6-1, the table were taking turns in ribbing the prince and Noel. The prince knew his stuff and a tirade of facts and impressive beat downs danced off of his tongue and his mates had nothing left. He saw me turn up my nose and asked who I supported. When I said Arsenal it spurred another conversation about how poorly they started off in the season. Someone told me they're going to get relegated this season. Ha! I expressed my opinion on Manchester United. The prince and I had our own little sparring session. It was great but a bit surreal given the context.

The prince asked everyone if they were coming out that night. I was definitely in as I wanted to know how royalty partied! He went round and asked everyone. One guy wasn't feeling up to it as he was getting over his ex but the prince twisted his arm eventually. Another protested saying he wasn't invited. He bit back, "Oh stop being so Chinese and come out." I laughed along with everyone and gave Josh a look of shock. Did he really just say that? Josh said that it's a Malay thing, ribbing each race like that. It's all meant in jest. Apparently it's polite in China to receive an invite to a party rather than just show up, so the prince's exasperation in his friend needing an invite prior to him asking was apt. Another jovial jab I picked up was a play on Pitbull's hit Give Me Everything with the chorus singing, "Grab somebody Indian tell them dei!" This is a play on their accent. I don't think this kind of innocent banter could ever exist in England.

I learnt other phrases and sayings in KL. In Malaysia the word "lah" is added to the end of words to add emphasis. I tried it a few times but thought I sounded silly so stopped. It felt like the moment when an aging adult attempts to use phrases overheard from teenagers. It just doesn't work. I also learnt that the Malaysian word for squid is used to describe an effeminate guy and the word clam is used to describe girly-girls.

On that note, it was time to go and I was in the mood for cake. Malaysia just happens to be full of bakeries and patisseries. Amen. Josh guided me to a suitable outlet and I picked up some chocolatey goodness.

Hello my pretty.

We spent the rest of the day chatting amongst ourselves and watching random drivel on the television. Josh has been ill for the past few days and it hadn't cleared up. We decided to give the night out a miss. I was still beat from the overnight coach ride so, despite my curiosity of how a night out in Malaysia would pan out, I was slightly grateful for the rest.

A statement, that would be repeated many times to me during my stay, was uttered at that moment - "What would you like to eat?" I had no idea so asked the guys to throw dish names at me and see which one stuck. I hadn't had a proper curry since being away and was craving it. When we arrived at the Malaysian-style curry house I was completely out of my element. The only thing that I understood on the menu was "Plain Naan". I asked the guys for help and ordered what I thought was a curry. What arrived in different stages was a large naan with a sauce platter, a plate of white rice and a plate of dry tandoori chicken. Ok. Not what I'm used to but it was nice. I do like a lot of sauce with my curry but the chicken was flavoursome without it. As the others tucked into some rice, we discussed several things that I could do whilst I was there and I was looking forward to the coming days.

The Longest Journey

I have now realised why I get that nervy unsettling feeling at the pit of my stomach each time I move to a new place. It's not that I think that I might have forgotten something. It's not that I'm moving to an area I'm not familiar with and it's certainly not culture shock. It has now dawned on me that moving to a new place means there's an arse of a journey ahead of me. I get through it like any other day and soon forget about the turmoil that unfolded once I have slept, eaten and had a much needed shower. I embrace my new home like an old friend and the events that unfolded hours previously are soon forgotten and replaced with the excitement of what's to come.

My journey from Phuket to Kuala Lumpur epitomises the above. With each move day, I feel a sense of pride in managing to organise my backpack with army precision. This day was no different. I shuffled my luggage down to reception and enjoyed my breakfast of eggs, bacon and toast included in my room charge. Happily replete, I carry myself across to reception to reconfirm for the third time that my bus is coming for me at 7:30am. TAT still hadn't sent across details of the journey itself or an arrival time which was especially annoying as I was due to meet and stay with a friend I made in Bangkok. Unfortunately, I had to leave a very vague Facebook message and hope for the best. In a last ditch attempt to calculate an arrival time I casually asked how long the journey would be - "24 hours madam." Say what now? I stumbled to the nearest seat. That can't be right. TAT told me 14 hours. I googled the distance and it's only a couple of hundred kilometers further than a journey which took me 10 hours. How would it take 14 hours extra for that short a distance? I started to list all the weird and wonderful methods of transport that could be slow enough to take me to KL in that time...

As the clock neared 9:30am, I was sat at the side of the road with some equally clueless travellers. I was still in Phuket and it was during this moment that I realised the journey really was going to be 24 hours. A couple next to me only just discovered this news and were arguing and pinning the blame on each other. I was alone so the fault was purely rested at my feet. I still wasn't too fussed as it's done now. I just wanted to get on the bus and rest. A mini-bus, that had previously toured Phuket picking up more and more travellers until we were uncomfortably squished in, had departed without so much as a goodbye. We then discovered that another mini-bus was on its way to pick us up. Six hours later, we arrived in Hat Yai. Drifting in and out of sleep made me feel worse but thankfully the couple from before were really chatty. Melissa and Steffan had seen a lot more of Thailand than I had but didn't have the best of luck. They had 200GBP stolen on their first day and their luggage was searched through on a bus journey. Steffan had an eye infection too and had a reaction to a cream he purchased from one of the pharmacies. My building collection of mozzie bites certainly paled in comparison. Mel and Steff told me they will also be heading to Australia and will base themselves in Sydney. I didn't have any firm plans but had a possible job contact in Sydney. We made loose plans to meet up and possibly house share. All our spirits lifted at this point. It was one good thing to come out of this hellish bus journey.

I felt a bit sorry for Steffan as Melissa and I bonded straight away. We had a lot in common and it was nice to have female company again. We arrived in Hat Yai with a smile only for it to be broken again with the news that it was a two and half hour wait until our coach to KL arrived. Steffan and I accepted our fate but Mel didn't let go just yet. We left her to argue with the ticket assistant and took a seat indoors. Mel came over, defeated. We decided to venture out for some food but couldn't find anyway that looked appetising. In the end we had to settle for KFC. It wasn't that nice. It was on our way back to the pick up point that we discovered a beautiful bakery that sold cake, food and ice cream. I was already full from the grease bucket earlier but enjoyed the free ice cream samples and decided to order a couple of scoops. Mel and Steff had a smoothie and two rounds of ice cream. Ironically, we didn't want to leave Hat Yai just yet but our coach had arrived.

The coach journey was standard. Idiot in front slammed is chair into my knees twice. He was lucky I didn't grab his ponytail and smash his face against the window. Of course, violence is never the answer. He was a drainer. The flashiest of flashpackers brandishing his passport and it's array of stamps from each country he has visited. I zoned out and put my music on. I wish it was a straight journey to KL but, as there wasn't a toilet on board, it was a continual stop-start situation. I had no chance of getting any sleep. I became progressively grumpy as the hours ticked by. I'm pretty sure I was foaming at the mouth when I reached border control. These two ladyboys were kicking off at the officials who questioned them. It's their own damn fault. They had male passports and filled out female details on the immigration slip. What did you think was going to happen? My patience was at its lowest ebb. Get me out of here!

We arrived two and a half hours earlier than scheduled. We had no idea where we were. Taxis were lined up and the drivers swarmed round each passenger like a hungry pack of hyenas sizing up its prey. We broke away from the chaos and I decided to follow Mel and Steff to their hostel until I could figure things out. It sounds like a good thing arriving early, but it was 4:30am and I told my friend that I'd be arriving at 7am. If he was a sane person, he'd be fast asleep. I had a little while to figure out a plan of action when I arrived at the hostel. Steff had lost the address details (a common occurrence) which delayed us somewhat. We managed to get the correct directions and found the hostel to be around the corner from the pick up point. A sneaky taxi driver said he would take us there but thankfully we declined. Another backpacker wasn't so lucky and was driven around for 15 minutes until arriving at the hostel. We each made a mental note not to trust the taxi drivers in KL!

The kind hostel receptionist allowed me to call my friend Josh who I had arranged to stay with. I thought I'd leave a voicemail and just hang around at the hostel. Josh picked up. Shit. It sounded like I woke him up. I previously left Josh a garbled voicemail in Hat Yai after Mel let me borrow her phone. He said he knew I'd be arriving earlier than expected. Josh couldn't pick me up so when the call ended I decided to check into the hostel and sleep for a while, then meet Josh later in the day. I was just about to hand over my debit card when Josh called back the hostel and said he'd come and pick me up. I was extremely thankful to him for that. I hugged Mel goodbye and said I'd be in touch when I'm next back in KL Central and off I went with Josh...

Weight arriving in Thailand: 66kg
Weight departing Thailand: 67.5kg
Spend in Thailand: TBC