Steff drove for around an hour and couldn’t stand the heat. Mel felt sick so I took over. We stopped once or twice for fuel and a drink. Six hours had passed and I’d barely noticed. I felt like I was in a trance. My body was doing the necessary jobs in keeping the car moving but my mind was on auto pilot. I just wanted to get there and nose-dive into the nearest bed.
As the sun set I grew a little apprehensive. Remembering what it was like last time I drove in the dark, I tried to be a bit more alert. I drove past several abrupt signs – If You Are Tired You Will Die. Every 500m I was haunted by the message of death on the roads. I felt ok though. Mel and Steff drifted in and out of sleep so I decided to carry on.
There were a lot of trucks and trailers on the road that night. It was frustrating driving 80kph in a 100-110kph zone. I confidently overtook most of them but there was one truck that night that I just couldn’t pass. I tried a couple of times but the car was too heavy so I could barely accelerate in the space given.
Next time, I knew I was going to get it so I increased my speed and looked out in front. There were no cars so I went for it. What I didn’t anticipate was a sharp corner and Mel sprang up in shock. I thought I could make it originally but now I knew I couldn’t so I slowed down. In a matter of seconds a cars headlights shone into our car. I was still in the opposite lane and a car was heading straight for us. Mel yelped and cowered, Steff shouted, and I sat in silence.
A strange calmness took over. Rather than panic and swerve, cover my eyes and pray or another knee-jerk reaction, I just calmly manoeuvred the car into the middle of the road. The truck moved to the left slightly and the car on the other side of the road moved across too giving me enough room to travel through. I slowed down and moved back into the correct lane. Nobody beeped their horn (I hate that noise) and I just kept saying sorry to Mel and Steff who were petrified by what just happened. We were literally inches from death. A head on smash would have been fatal and we were incredibly close. I felt terrible, not for my close call with death, but the fact that I put Mel and Steff through that and that I almost did kill them!
I carried on driving, wondering why I was so calm in the face of death. Is that normal? It’s a reaction that saved us all. Mel and Steff were surprisingly supportive. I thought they’d kick me out of the car and give me shit. Five minutes later and we were laughing and joking about something. We’d swapped drivers and I was in the back resting. We started talking about the future and Mel got all sentimental and said some nice things about me.
The last hour and a half of the trip felt like treble that amount of time. The hostel which we booked at was at the bottom of the street so we didn’t waste time looking for it.
We parked up the car and made our way to reception which was on the opposite side of the grounds. Tiredness really hit me then and I wasn’t up for being messed around. I just wanted to check in and go to bed.
Reception closed at 9pm and we arrived at 9:40pm. Great. Nobody had any credit to call the night officer so I asked the bouncer across the street if he could help. He radioed somebody to come across and check us in.
It had been 15 minutes and nobody had come across. My patience was wearing thin. I went back to the bouncer and he radioed through again. A few minutes later a guy turned up to check us in.
As I filled in the form two words made me want to vomit. Passport number. I only brought my purse with me to pay. Everything else was back at the car. I asked if I could hand in the information tomorrow but he said that he can’t check us in until everything is filled out. Bullshit. We also needed to give $20 cash deposit for the key. That I did have.
I walked back to the car to get my passport. Steff asked me to get his as well. Mine was within easy reach. Steff’s however was a pain in the arse to get. I needed to shift the heavily strapped in surf board on the roof, open the boot, life his suitcase out and rummage around. Eventually I found it just as Steff was walking up to see if I needed a hand. It’s a bit late now!
I was trying my best to hold in my anger as I knew I was ratty because I was tired. Mel and Steff don’t deserve my wrath and it’d bite me in the ass if I was a dick to the reception guy. It’d only be a short-lived thrill.
Once everything was sorted with the reception guy, I went back to the car and emptied it of my things. Mel and Steff were hungry so went off to get some food. I couldn’t stomach anything. It was only as they pulled away that I completely forgot what room number we were in. The number wasn’t on the key card. I wandered around aimlessly in a feeble attempt to jog my decrepit memory but failed. I sat by the road defeated.
Mel and Steff weren’t that long and laughed at me. I wasn’t in the mood to joke back. We collapsed in our beds. I was glad that the guys took pity on me and let me choose my bed. I hate being in the top bunk.
The guys in our room were chatty and friendly. I tried to join in but my brain wasn’t functioning. The guy said he was an expert on Thailand and had been many times when he was younger. He said he and his mate were due to go back soon and meet up with other friends. I got the last part and asked if he’d been to Koh Phi Phi. I continued to talk about it and say that he should go. Mel laughed at me and explained the above which I’d not heard. With that, I mellowed down and got ready for bed. I tried to be social but my brain’s just not there with me.
*****
Surprise, surprise, we slept in until late. There was a free breakfast at the hostel but there was no way that I was moving a muscle. We checked in for our boat trip due to start the next day and wandered around doing nothing for the rest of the day.
When we returned to the hostel, the two guys from the previous night had checked out and were replaced by a couple. At first I thought they were speaking another language. But then I caught part of their conversation and the guy was speaking to some of his mates with a Scottish accent. Ha!
We spoke to them for a while about our trip and swapped stories. They were heading to Fraser Island and we’re off on a boat trip that their friend went on.
We’d heard mixed reviews. Some said it was brilliant and others said it was too crazy for them. It sounded very much like a party boat. Janine from castaway had just been on the boat and told me some gross stories. I guess we’ll just have to see for ourselves!
I tried to make the day as productive as possible and booked my trip to Fiji. I attempted to haggle and managed to get just over $120 off the RRP. It’s better than nothing I guess.
*****
Whilst I waited alone, I got chatting to a few German guys and a couple of Aussie girls. One by one, everyone arrived with the same goon. It was fun spotting the people with cheap booze against those who had more cash and could upgrade to a better beer. There was no glass allowed on board so everyone had goon, cans and plastic bottles filled with spirits.
In total, there were 51 people. That’s a scary amount of people on one boat!
We all boarded the boat, dumped our things and headed to the top deck for an intro talk. It was pretty standard. The itinerary was listed along with a few safety rules. Our rooms were assigned. We grabbed our things and made our way to our room.
Steff was not happy with the bed situation.
Our room resembled a game of Jenga. Each bed was stacked up. I was quite happy to be on the bottom bed to begin with, until I saw that Mel’s bed cut right across mine and my legs kept banging against the bottom of her bed. That’s not going to be fun. We also found our toilet and shower was adjoined to the cabin alongside ours. We both opened the door at the same time. That could be interesting!
We all made light of the situation (apart from Steff!). There was no set schedule for the evening. It was just a case of finding our bearings and taking it easy. Everyone started drinking already but I wasn’t so sure. Mel cracked open the goon anyway. It was awful.
I felt incredibly awkward looking around trying to find someone to talk to. I didn’t want to cling on to Mel and Steff for the whole boat ride but that’s exactly what I ended up doing. People were already on the boat with friends. Some groups joined together which made it even trickier to find my “in”.
Soon it was time for dinner which was a welcome distraction. We had fish that night and it was actually pretty good.
Mel and Steff were unsure what to do next so I suggested getting my cards. I thought it’d be a good ice breaker to invite people down to play some drinking games. Nobody else volunteered to go up so I went around and asked if anyone would be interested in playing some drinking games. The music was too loud to make an overall announcement. Everybody I went up to said yes. In the end, practically everyone came down!
Luckily there were other packs of cards lying around so people created their own separate games. Some people didn’t really get the hint and tried playing Ring Of Fire with about 20 people. It was terrible. The highlight was watching one girl licking two oranges suggestively. These oranges had just been down a guy’s pants after a previous bet.
Once that game was over, we moved to the floor and started playing games with signs and noises. Trying to explain the simplest of games to people became rather tiresome but it was all good fun once everyone got the hang of it. I learnt quite a few new drinking games to add to the repertoire.
Now that people had a few drinks down them, they were a lot friendlier and open to conversation which was nice. I didn’t stay up too late though as we were due to be woken up at 6:30am! We went to bed around midnight but the party carried on. I didn’t get to sleep for quite a while and wasn’t looking forward to the wake-up call.
As I drifted off to sleep someone banged on our door. Aren't we a little too old for knock-a-door-run? The banging got louder until finally someone stormed in and opened our toilet door. Obviously one of us forgot to unlock the toilet door the other side. There are other toilets there though. We were shocked and annoyed but too tired to actually do anything about it. Tomorrow perhaps...
*****
A lively crew member banged on the door and shouted wakey-wakey. I groaned and rolled back over. Despite there being breakfast upstairs, I slept in for another hour. We managed to grab the last couple of pieces of toast.
Today was our main day for activities. We stopped off at Whitehaven Beach first. We needed to walk through a bit of bushland to get there. Mel and I saw a photo of a massive spider on a girl’s phone from this trip so we weren’t looking forward to the walk.
There were no spiders to be seen. We stopped off at a view point. The whole kingdom and his father were taking photos. I had one taken and was out of there!
The beach was certainly white. The sand was soft to begin with but grew bitty as I walked further in. It was very windy and the Brit in me made me think of the cold bitter days I had on Filey/Whitby/Scarborough beach. There were no fish and chips or ice cream hut to pacify me though.
I tried to lay my towel down but it kept blowing everywhere. Instead, I donned an embarrassing stinger suit and went into the ocean. The water was clear but it was pretty still. I grew bored after a few minutes and came back out. I took off the suit and decided to spend the rest of the time sun bathing. Problem was, it was a bit of a cloudy day.
The group chatted away about random things and we even played charades for a little while. Mel chose a couple of films that were used on Fraser Island so I didn’t bother taking part. It was funny to see other people’s interpretations.
One of the crew members from the boat came over to take photos. It is his job to take a million and one photos of everyone which he sells at the end. I posed for a few photos but recoiled in horror when I saw them later.
The guy tried piling everyone up into a pyramid. I felt so sorry for the guys on the bottom! We managed the jumping shot and general group shots without any problems.
Our time was up and we went back to the boat to head across to the snorkelling spot. I was really looking forward to this. Mel and Steff managed to find a spider to take a photo of on the way back. It wasn’t as big as the one we saw on the girl’s phone but it was still impressive.
Before we headed out into the water we had lunch. Sandwiches and pasta salad filled us up nicely.
We all had to don the stinger suits again. They were cold and sandy from Whitehaven which made me shudder. Instead of life jackets we had noodles. Maybe you might have seen them being used in an aqua fit class back home. It did the job and kept me afloat nicely.
I swam about for a while but didn’t see that much. The reef was nice and there were fishes which swam up close to me but it wasn’t even in the same vicinity as the snorkelling in Thailand. I wish I had my underwater camera for that. I still have the memories though.
Mel and Steff didn’t wake up after we settled down for a lunchtime nap. I went in first and met them after half an hour. They made the mistake of bringing their towels out and it started to rain. I had swam around for over an hour at this point and kept seeing the same things so I called it a day. I was also bursting for the toilet!
Back at the boat, the waterslide had been put out and so had the diving board. Both drops looked scary. I went to the waterslide and sat for a while. Steff pushed me in and I didn’t enjoy it one bit.
As I swam back around to get on the boat, the current kept pushing me further and further out. I was glad there were a couple of other people in the water who helped me back on the boat! I didn’t have a noodle to save me that time!
I decided not to go on the slide again. I tried to jump off of the diving board but it looked too scary. I think it was walking the plank that did it for me. I jumped off the top deck of the boat in Thailand with everyone and that was quite fun.
A couple of girls went in before me and they hated it. I have three videos of me stood at the edge of the plank papping myself whilst trying to convince myself to jump. I don’t regret not doing it. I did the Aqua Loop ride in Gold Coast to prove a point to myself but I didn’t enjoy it. I knew that water would go up my nose and I hate that feeling.
After getting showered and dry, we sat down for a lovely hot brew. Everyone was banging on about how great the snorkelling was.
A group of people, including Mel and Steff, started playing poker. I’d never played before so Mel taught me. It was incredibly satisfying as Mel is very much a risk taker and was down to her last chips. Yet she came back fighting and ended up coming third out of around eight people.
We had spaghetti bolognaise for dinner which again was nice and filling. The crew do a good job to say that they’re catering for such a large number. There was enough for everyone. There’s only one female crew member and the guys always shouted ladies first at meal times. To begin with, nobody listened and I too thought he was joking. It’s a nice gesture which ensures that most people get fed before the greedy get to it!
We were back on the alcohol and I transferred over to Malibu this time. I’d had enough of the goon from the night before. We played more drinking games and then the crew got involved. Everyone was ushered up to the top deck and told to change into fancy dress. By the time I got there, there was nothing but a few shreds of material. I did the best I could and decided to be a granny. I tied a black piece of wetsuit around my head and found some high-waist shorts.
I felt sorry for the crew having to do this day in day out. To begin with it was very cheesy and forced but once we got into it, it was quite fun. We got knocked out at the rowing stage. I got a wet arse for nothing. I went back to my room and got changed.
Back at the top, they were still going until it was down to four people. They had a dance off and an American guy won. He did have some pretty good dance moves!
We carried on playing drinking games into the night again. This time they got a bit more wacky. We played a game called shup-shuppoo. You have to cover your teeth with your lips and raise your eyebrows. This face has to be kept at all times. Each player goes round saying “shup”. To change direction you say “shuppoo”. At first we were in stitches but then everyone got better and better. It was a surreal yet highly entertaining game.
I think this night got a bit more raucous. As we were playing a game, I noticed a couple kissing by the cups cupboard. Someone whispered to me that they were having sex. No way. I looked around and the guy had his willy wonka out! The girl still had her shorts on but I couldn’t quite see. I ran down and told Mel and Steff.
It made me sick. Not what they were doing but the fact that they were doing that where our food was to be served the next day. Dirty bastards. Get a room!
Earlier someone was having sex in the shower. The door was very squeaky. This boat was hook up city or perhaps not as most of the people on board was couples.
We tried to get to sleep amongst all the sex noises and squeaky doors!
*****
We slept in…again. We missed breakfast and the snorkelling. Whoops. We weren’t too bothered as the snorkelling the day before wasn’t up to much. Unfortunately people did come back and told us it was brilliant. But they also said that before so who knows!
The boat trip was almost over. I was neither happy nor sad. I couldn’t tell who was genuine or not. Everyone was friendly when they were drunk and groggy and quiet when they were sober. I couldn’t tell who was genuine or not. I met a nice couple on board who I thought I’d see again in New Zealand or Fiji as we’d both be there at the same time, but I don’t think it will happen. Mel reminded me of this fact when we settled back at Airlie Beach. I hope I do a better job of making friends in New Zealand!
There were hotdogs for lunch but some greedy people went back for seconds so not everyone had one. We were all distracted with our games of poker but managed to just get one.
The boat pulled up at lunchtime and we all parted ways. Mel and Steff were eager to get off and look for jobs. We started looking in hostels and within an hour Mel and Steff had a job.
I checked in to the hostel there, picked up my itinerary for Fiji and had lunch. I didn’t have too much packing to do as I’d already gotten rid of a load of stuff in 1770. I still feel like I’m carrying too much and it’s frustrating. It’s the same feeling I get when I walk into my bedroom. Except this time I really can’t get rid of anything as most of it is bulky stuff that I need.
It still hadn’t sunk in that the next day I would be saying goodbye to Mel and Steff. We were all terribly blasé about it all. We stayed up late to make the most of the evening but Steff fell asleep. Our last night of bonding didn’t quite go according to plan. Never mind!
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