“If you can get your heart going, it does make you happier and I get my heart going by moaning. When I get annoyed, that’s when my heart kicks in. It’s a win-win for me ‘cos my heart gets going when I’m having a moan and that makes me feel a bit better and if I’m happy, I’m happy.” Karl Pilkington, An Idiot Abroad, Season 2, Episode 6.
My attempts at condensing down my last three months in Sydney haven’t quite gone according to plan. Upon reflection and some feedback from friends, it looks like my exasperated moans might have come across as a bit snobby and holier than thou. This was not my intention nor does it represent who I am, so this instalment of my blog is part disclaimer part set-the-record-straight statement.
In general terms, I have always tried to keep the tone of my blog light but informative whilst maintaining the look of a diary. Like a diary, my blog has been a silent friend who has listened to my times of great achievement and moments of elation, as well as my times of utter despair when things have gone wrong. My diary doesn’t judge me and is there as an outlet to vent in times of need. With me, what you see is what you get, and it’s the same with my diary. My emotions come flowing though my blog like it’s an extension of my soul. When I’m happy my blog posts bounce and flourish but when I’m in a dark place the words might bite and end on a sour note.
Like my personality, I don’t choose to hide my true opinions and observations. My blog isn’t a never-ending Facebook status. I don’t want it to be full of fake projections of how fantastic my life is and how wonderful I feel. Of course, when I’m happy, I’ll write that I’m happy. But when I’m sad, you will also see that side.
I’ll cast you back to my blog post about my stay in Koh Phangan. That was an awful time for me and I wasn’t going to shy away from that. I was naïve and walked into that party with the hazy misconceptions filtered through to me from friends and Google links. Thankfully I came prepared and, with a large stroke of luck, ended up back at my bungalow safe and sound. I wanted to remember that moment and how I felt as I know that when I’m back in England I won’t be thinking about the bad times. All I’ll remember are all the remnants of how great my trip was and how I want to go out and do more travelling. But I want to remember that there were certain moments where things didn’t go according to plan but I pulled through it and came out the other side. I’m a stronger person for it and it’s one of many elements to my trip where I have learned a lot.
Obviously my blog isn’t just about me. I want to share these life lessons and tribulations with you too. I guess it’s partly so you don’t make the same mistakes as I did, but also to show that life as a traveller isn’t all as glamourous as the guide books and travel shows portray!
I hope the above has served as a justifiable context to the reason why my past few blogs have been a bit arsey. I entered Australia on the dizzy notion that it was the place to be. So many Brits fly out to Australia and never come back so it must be some kind of awesome. Things haven’t quite gone according to plan so, at my lowest points, I felt like I’d been short-changed. Where’s my flipping Australian dream eh?
Seeing the bigger picture – I’m on a brilliant year-long round the world trip full of adventure, great laughs and even greater food…not forgetting the cake of course – it’s easy to sit back and wonder what all the fuss is about. I should just shut my mouth and enjoy the ride. Unfortunately it’s not been that easy. I’ve had to make Australia my temporary home. At my home in England, I have certain anchors which keep me steady and strong when a shit storm hits. The obvious ones being my parents and my closest friends who know me through and through, but you’ll be surprised how significant the little things are that get you through the day. Imagine a day consisting of a series of unfortunate events. You’re late for work, your boss shouts at you, stroppy workers/customers take out their own frustrations on you, the rain batters you on the way home and a truck rolls through a massive puddle drenching you from head to toe…and so on and so forth. When you get home, you kick off your shoes, stretch out on the sofa and catch up on your stories thanks to Sky+ or you head for a nice long steamy shower and have a good ol’ pamper session.
For me, I bake. Baking matches my personality completely. You have to be a perfectionist. Too much flour and your cake is dry, too much butter and it’s too greasy and can sometimes sink in the pan and not cook properly. I love creating sugary, heavenly goodness from a box of ingredients. I intended on living in a house-share situation whilst out in Australia, but this fell through. If I did, I would have had an oven and could bake until the cows came home. I don’t have access to an oven here. It did knock me down a little bit.
It’s one of many things that have slowly pushed me further and further to the brink of boiling point. Living in this hostel knowing that someone has rifled through my things and taken my food*, my flip-flops were stolen, my boss picked me apart from start to finish throughout all my shifts for a while, backpackers speaking to you like they’re your best friends one day then ditching you for a new group of people, not being able to move about freely in my room as it’s so small, not having enough money to eat properly…and so on and so forth. All these things by themselves aren’t much. You’d grumble for a few minutes and then move on. But all those things and more can gradually pull you down until one day, you go to make a tuna pasta salad and find that the mayonnaise you spent $5 tastes like something out of a sweet/candy/lollie store and you want to scream “Fuuuuuuuuuuuuck!” but you can’t as there are people around you.
So yes, I have been a bit downbeat about Australia so far as it’s not what I thought it would be. The Northern Beaches of Sydney is definitely not full of the kind of people that make Australia a country worth living in. It sounds harsh but even the Australian TNT magazine (backpackers travel magazine) agrees with me stating that Aussies in Tasmania are a heck of a lot nicer and more laid back.
I have moaned a bit but sometimes it’s good for the soul to have a bit of a moan. A thought which is expressed perfectly by Karl Pilkington in this clip during the Route 66 episode. Even though a lot of what Karl Pilkington says is hilarious, he does make sense sometimes and he moans a lot more than I do when he's travelling!
So there you go, that’s me. I hope that all makes sense and adds a bit more context to my previous posts. If not, well…err…just keep reading, it does get better as I have had fun days here.
*Since writing this blog post, the thief has been caught and thrown out of the hostel. Hooray!!!
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