Sydney So Far...Merry Christmas...

Where is Christmas? I couldn’t find it anywhere in Sydney. I had to look hard but I did find it eventually. The Northern Beaches was the antithesis of Singapore which was doused in Christmas decorations. One shopping centre looked like Santa had threw up on it. Kuala Lumpur start their celebrations in early November! Even in the UK, the supermarkets and retail outlets jump on Christmas, putting out crackers and mince pies in September and playing Christmas songs in November. I didn’t hear my first Christmas song until the middle of December and I almost escaped the warbling’s of Mariah Carey. Unfortunately, where I work we had Mariah’s Christmas albums – oh yes, she has more than one!

As annoying as these characteristics are, they all act as triggers to getting excited about Christmas. You all know it’s coming when Coca Cola tells you so! The surrounding areas on the Northern Beaches lay bare. There were no decorations, no lights or banners. There were no screaming brats nagging for presents or drunken people playing dress up. I saw a flicker of Christmas cheer in the drivers who attached red noses and antlers to their cars. It was sweet. But that was it. Everyone seemed so calm. Where are all the Christmas nut jobs?

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not exactly Little Miss Christmas, but it just surprised me. I guess it helped slightly as I thought I’d start missing home more around this time of the year. I didn’t have my mum acting all grouchy when my Dad jokingly claimed that he would put up the decorations on 1^st December. I wouldn’t get to see my mum’s face when she came home from work after my Dad put up the decorations without her knowledge! I wouldn’t get to eat all the candy canes off of the Christmas tree. Heck, I wouldn’t have a Christmas tree, not in the family sense anyway.

*Cue the violins*

I did feel a little twang when I served people at work who were meeting to swap Christmas presents. I wasn’t even going to get a present and I was stuck in the cave for Christmas.
I soon skipped to my happy place when a surprise parcel arrived from my parents. It included a card with photos - a happy photo of my Dad and a bah-humbug one of my Mum. I also received tinsel, candy canes and a selection box. I was so happy. I pinned my card up on my cupboard and devoured my treats in good time. I also received a card from another friend in time for Christmas. I also received two others in January but it still meant just as much to me. I love receiving correspondence from friends in any format.

Although I had my doubts, I had a bleedin’ fantastic Christmas so up yours Sydney with your dreariness.

Mel and Steff said they would like to buy me something for Christmas and of course I said I’d return the favour. Hooray, I’d have something to open on Christmas Day. I think we were all clinging on to each other to make it through Christmas as we’d all be missing home.

We also naively volunteered to host the Christmas Party thinking it’d be a nice distraction and a juicy monetary bonus. Oh ho ho ho (ahem…sorry), how wrong we were.

In the lead up to the big day, we had a few brief discussions regarding the food we’d buy, how the day would unfold and what activities we could include. As we’d never done anything like this before we had no idea what our budget would be or what to price our tickets as.

Annoyingly, each time a meeting was organised with the manager, I was working. This meant it looked like I was doing bugger all and sailing by on the efforts of my roommates.

The speed in which Christmas Day arrived shocked us all. It didn’t help that two weeks before Christmas Day we found a flyer for the Sunburnt party on Bondi Beach. The majority of people staying in this hostel were party hard think later types. Shit. We soon realised that our Christmas party wasn’t going to simply sell itself. We had to get on it!

We originally planned to lay out a Christmas buffet – a staple in many British households at Christmas – but this worked out more expensive and would likely lead to arguments. As in, we’d get the greedy bastards piling their plates high leaving us high and dry with only a mangled sausage roll and pasta salad to serve to people who had queued 20 minutes.

Mel discussed our dilemma with her manager at work and came up with the idea of serving a traditional Christmas dinner (in the British sense of course).  It would mean that everyone would know what they were getting and would make things a heck of a lot simpler.

After a mad shopping spree, we sold the following for $30 AKA 20 squids:

A three course meal with a choice of turkey or ham. Chocolate cake and mixed berries for dessert.
Glass of champagne on arrival.
Unlimited cordial.
Christmas cracker.

What we didn’t anticipate was the sniffy reaction from the hostel occupants. All they saw was the price tag and obviously thought that we’d bought in cheap ready meals and charged “a fortune” to rake in money. Idiots. We didn’t cut any corners and it was a shame that people didn’t see this.

When it came to the last minute hard sell, one guy told me him and his mates were going to have a barbeque on the beach as you can get Christmas dinner at home every year and they wanted to do something different. Oh dear. I’ve had countless barbeques here, it’s nothing new just because it’s on Christmas Day. Mel, Steff and I wanted to bring a bit of home to people as a form of comfort. Obviously people will be feeling homesick so why not get the best of both worlds – a Christmas Dinner topped off with a visit to the beach! We were fighting a losing battle.

Another knock down came in the form of a backpacker, who was actually meant to be a friend of Mel and Steff’s, who was stirring up trouble. A lot of people said they were going to buy their own stuff and cook in the kitchen then join in the party and the “free stuff” later. We didn’t anticipate anyone would gatecrash a flipping Christmas party! We were devastated by the betrayal and were stressing at the thought of us three vs. the 200+ occupants. We tried our best to put that thought to the back of our minds and plough on.

The night before Christmas, Mel was working so it was left to Steff and I to prep the food for the next day. Not a problem we thought. Ha! Thankfully Mel’s work chopped and roasted a mountain of potatoes for us. We only had one oven, which is located in the night manager’s housing. We’d be there for a week cooking all those potatoes!

All we had to prep was the meat. We spent all afternoon and evening carving the heffers! Steff and I saw light of the situation as I pressed all my weight on one end of the pig whilst Steff carved away with a bread knife. Deary me! The turkey started to cook but we panicked when we opened the oven to see the skin started to crisp and burn slightly before the rest of it was cooked. All I had were visions of our turkey ending up like the one in National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation! I grabbed my phone to ring my mum only to realise it’d be the early hours in the UK. Damn the stupid 11 hour time difference. To Google! We wrapped the turkey in foil and every now and then doused it in the juices that had built up. Steff was already plotting how he’d use the bones and juices to make proper gravy.

Once all the meat had been prepped I fretted about the next day. We would have to keep everything piping hot which seemed an impossible task. Nobody wants a cold Christmas dinner. What if we create a hate mob and they chase us out of the hostel? In the end we only managed to sell 30 or so tickets which meant we didn’t break even with the money the hostel spent purchasing the food (we originally catered for 80 people!). We didn’t have to pay the difference thankfully! Even though we’d not made any money and weren’t sure if we would get a night’s stay credit, we just wanted everyone to be happy. Perhaps our nobility might not look believable but it’s genuinely what we wanted. There are some people staying alone in the hostel without many friends around them so we wanted to create a warmth and familiarity for them. If we didn’t do this, they would have just sat in their room or gone to the beach and did nothing. We crossed our fingers for a hassle free day.

***** 

Christmas morning arrived. We got up early as we needed to be in the kitchen for 10am to cordon off the kitchen and start organising the food. People ignored our request and cooked their breakfasts and early Christmas meals. None of us were up for any arguments on Christmas Day so we just announced that we’d need the kitchen an hour or so later. Nobody cared.

We went back to the room and organised our Christmas presents into piles. Normally at home my Dad is chief present handler and ensures that each person has a present to open at the same time as everyone else. My mum isn’t arsed and just hands presents out willy nilly and we just open them. I was too excited to see Steff and Mel’s reactions when they saw what I’d got them so we didn’t really have an order to proceedings. I got Mel the pink fluffy dressing gown she desperately wanted (it was a battle making sure she didn’t buy it beforehand!). I also got Mel a pink diary, a pink pen and a pink wash bag. A few days previously Mel and I were in the shop where I got the wash bag and dressing gown from. When I abruptly told Mel that she doesn’t need a dressing gown as it’s Australia not Antarctica, I also had to tell Mel that I won’t purchase the wash bag reduced to $5 with my purchase as she’s already got a wash bag. I had to be a moody cow to one of my closest friends. I knew she’d understand – cue laughter and shouting when Mel opened her presents.

I got Steff some Joop! man perfume which I liked the smell of and hoped he did too! I also got him a white mouse which he really wanted for his laptop. Mel was ecstatic with her building mountain of pink related presents and Steff got everything that he wanted from Mel and I.

I received a portable speaker for my ipod shuffles and netbook. I kept hijacking Steff’s bomb he got free with his phone. I thought it was actually called a music bomb but I don’t think it is. I always wondered why Steff gave me odd looks when I asked if I could use his bomb. I received a pen light to use in my future travels as well as some cute bed shorts.

We all had massive grins on our faces. In our giddy excitement we all pulled crackers.

Sidenote: I still can’t get over Steff’s suggestion that we only buy half the amount of crackers as it takes two people to pull a cracker. As we all burst out laughing, Steff stood there with a serious look on his face and still didn’t understand the absurdity of what he just said.

We read out our cheesy-rubbish jokes, glanced at the naff “prize” and donned the party hats. Mel ignored the fact that it was boiling hot and wrapped her pink dressing gown around her. Party hats in tow, we made our way to the kitchen. We were all smiles and laughter, then realised how ridiculous we must have looked. Wait. We told everyone that they had to leave the kitchen in 15 minutes as we needed it for the party and started to set up the dining area. Then we realised how ridiculous we must have looked. Meh.

When asked what we’d done that morning, we received shocked responses when we told people we had bought each other presents. Nobody else we spoke to had done that. Whoops.  We subsequently toned down the happiness from the presents we received.

As the majority of the hostel occupants weren’t taking part in our party, it proved ever more difficult cordoning off the common room. We moved tables to lead a path in and out of the kitchen and on the other side to the pool and BBQ area but people swanned through without a care. We even put up massive signs saying no entry to no avail.

After a bit of sweat – more so for Mel in her dressing gown – and determination…well it was a hassle fending off the area…we managed to create a nice Christmassy vibe.

Steff was the chef for the day and spent most of lunchtime holed up in the kitchen creating his signature gravy and making the final preparations for the meals. Mel and I rolled our eyes as all he kept banging on about was his gravy. We left Gordon Ramsey to it – not too much of a deviation as Steff does flip his lid in the kitchen when you try to help.

Mel and I went off to get changed. Steff had bought Mel a beautiful dress.

Where's my dress Steff?

I threw on a dress I bought in Thailand and hoped I didn’t look too hobo-ish stood next to Mel with her immaculate make-up and voluminous hair. I needn't have worried as I was one of only a few who dressed up for the party! I guess it's another thing that was drilled into me by my parents. As much as I wanted to sit around in my pyjamas and play with my toys all day, my mum told me to get up them stairs and change into something nice for dinner!

*****

It was time. More and more people started to arrive. I placed down a bread roll for everyone – bought in fresh from the bakery next door don’t you know! Phew, well that was easy.

People were flipping hungry and devoured their rolls within seconds. Shit. Now comes the hard part. Although the food was awesome – we bought the best meat, had professionally cooked potatoes, Steff’s signature gravy with the standard stuffing and mixed veg staples – keeping it piping hot was a pain in the arse. There was no oven in the kitchen and there was only me and Mel to hand out dishes to 30-odd people. This isn’t going to work and we knew it. We just hoped people were in the Christmas spirit and forgot about all that. Ok, we gave everyone extra glasses of champagne and hoped the bubbles made the eventuality all hazy.

Mel and I did our best to hand out all the dishes as well as serve gravy and cranberry sauce (which I ran out and bought when a hosteller requested it the night before. Oops!). We had a little help from one of Mel’s friends which was nice. We told her we couldn’t pay her, which was true, and she still helped. We had a few arsey people which disappointed us. I also had a bit of a mishap with the first round of gravy. We had Steff’s concoction and normal granule gravy. Unbeknownst to me, this had lumped together. I went to pour some on a girl’s plate and a huge dollop plopped down. I stifled a snigger and she mumbled something German. Argh! I ran back into the kitchen and got Steff’s gravy and used that for everyone else.

Once everyone had dishes in front of them we hid in the kitchen and made preparations for dessert. We didn’t have time to sit down and eat anything. We wanted to make sure that people were happy before we helped ourselves. One woman brought her food in and slammed it in the microwave. Shit.

We cleared everyone’s dishes. Some dishes were fuller than others but I’d eat a cold soup if I was hungry so didn’t judge people’s reactions on what was left on the plates. We scurried away back into the kitchen and waited for the food to settle.

Mel and I had a sneaky nibble of some of the cake. It was good. You can’t go wrong with chocolate cake! We handed that out with ease and poured cream for those who wanted it. Again, we hid in the kitchen. Mel and Steff plated some food up but I couldn’t stomach it. I ate a little bit but wasn’t that hungry. Sometimes when you make a huge meal, at the end you don’t really want to eat it. I’ve spoken to a few people in the past about this and they agreed with me so I know it’s not as weird as it sounds!

Cake on the other hand…well, you know me. As we had plenty left over we topped up people’s glasses and offered out more cake. We had enough berries left for me, Mel and Steff but before we could get some, a backpacker grabbed the bowl and poured the lot on his plate. Greedy little bast…no, it’s Christmas, I’m not getting angry on Christmas. I still hate backpackers. So we ate our cakes plain but still enjoyed the chocolatey goodness.

We started to clear things away when the guy who bad-mouthed our party* stood up and gave a speech about how well we’d done and how thankful he was. Everyone whooped and hollered in agreement. We were flabbergasted. One sweet old man said it was the best Christmas he’d ever had which was endearing but sad to hear at the same time.

Everyone was happy which made us even happier. Now, for the clear up. Luckily, everyone was fine with going off for a rest and wasn’t hanging on our every word as to what will happen next. We packed everything away and moved back all the tables. We were knackered.

We decided to go to the beach for a little while and had a few drinks. When we returned we set up the surf simulator for everyone, not just the party-goers, to have a try at. One family who attended the party each had a go, even the dad! It was hilarious. I had a go but I was wearing a dress so it ended badly.

 Of course I don’t have a photo of me falling off. Don’t be silly!

Soon enough it was getting late and we packed it up and relaxed with others in the common room. We got out a couple of packs of cards for people to play with. There was only one thing for it…Ring Of Fire anyone?

I started to feel a little light-headed and merry from the drinks and lack of food. With only the sugar remnants from two pieces of chocolate cake lining my stomach, my head was floating on a sugar and alcohol induced high.

That feeling was soon shattered when those around me spoiled Ring Of Fire. It’s fine when everyone just goes along with it but too many people were asking questions, nobody followed the rules and the group didn’t quite fit together personality-wise. It was a shame. I soon packed it in and went back to the room. Mel and Steff stayed for a bit longer but too grew bored of everyone.

We each collapsed into bed with smiles still pinned to our faces. Despite the chaos, we had a very good day. I drifted off to sleep happy with my Christmas spent away from home. Mel and Steff are like family to me so it didn’t feel like a non-Christmas, more of an alternative Christmas. Like Christmas spent at your Aunties. It’s different surroundings but you still have the same crazy surroundings and food-a-plenty. A hostel Christmas wasn’t as bad as I thought it would be. Who knew eh? Oh and I almost forgot, Steff's gravy was actually worth the hype after all!

* we told him how we felt about the situation calmly. He had no idea what he’d done and was shamed into attending the Christmas Party. Well that’s what he told us. In reality the manager gave him the choice of attending or leaving the hostel as he was on his last warning already.